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Happy Families
Please get up Mr. Tyrrell.

ASTON.
(Climbing to his feet.) I can’t think how I ever came to be such a brute.

TOPSY.
(Coldly.) I thought we had agreed not to talk about this incident any further, (There is a silence.)

SIR JASPER.
Well, Aston? This has been rather fun.

BELLE.
I wish you hadn’t been quite so cold with him, Topsy. Poor man! He really is very sorry. One can see that.

HENRIKA.
But did you see that awful face? (She shudders and covers her eyes.)

ASTON.
(Picking up his dummy and manipulating it.) It is very hot in here, is it not? Shall we go back to the dancing-room?

TOPSY.
(Also takes up her dummy.) Yes, let us go back.

ASTON’S DUMMY.
Isn’t that «Roses in Picardy «that the ‘ band is playing?

TOPSY’S DUMMY.
I believe it is. What a very good band, don’t you think?

ASTON’S DUMMY.
Yes; it plays during dinner, you know, at the Necropole. (To JASPER.) Lord, what a fool I am! I’d quite forgotten; it was she who told me so as we came in.

TOPSY’S DUMMY.
At the Necropole? Really.

ASTON’S DUMMY.
A very good band and a very good floor.

TOPSY’S DUMMY.
Yes, it’s a perfect floor, isn’t it? Like glass. . . . (They go out, followed by their respective families. BELLE supports HENRIKA, who is still very weak after her shock.)

BELLE.
How exciting it was, wasn’t it, HENRIKA?

HENRIKA.
Wasn’t it awful—too awful! Oh, that face. . . . (CAIN follows ASTON out in silence and dejection. SIR JASPER brings up the rear of the procession. His face wears its usual expression of slightly bored amusement. He lights a cigarette.)

SIR JASPER.
Charming evening, charming evening. . . . Now it’s over, I wonder whether it ever existed. (He goes out. The conservatory is left empty. The flowers flash their luminous pistils; the eyes of the assa-fcetida blossoms solemnly wink; leaves shake and sway and rustle; several of the flowers are heard to utter a low chuckle, while the Alocusia, ofter whistling a few derisive notes, finally utters a loud, gross Oriental hiccough.)

THE CURTAIN SLOWLY DESCENDS.

The End

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Please get up Mr. Tyrrell. ASTON.(Climbing to his feet.) I can't think how I ever came to be such a brute. TOPSY.(Coldly.) I thought we had agreed not to talk