FAT LADY [interrupting] Oh, how interesting! Perhaps the Spaniard was born in one of our houses and is a baby now!
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Quite possibly.
PROFESSOR. I think it is time we began.
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. I was only going to say …
PROFESSOR. It is getting late.
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Very well. Then we will commence. Antón Borísitch, be so good as to hypnotise the medium.
GROSSMAN. What method would you like me to use? There are several methods. There is Braid’s system, there is the Egyptian symbol, and there is Charcot’s system.
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [to the Professor] I think it is quite immaterial.
PROFESSOR. Quite.
GROSSMAN. Then I will make use of my own method, which I showed in Odessa.
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. If you please!
Grossman waves his arms above Simon. Simon closes his eyes and stretches himself.
GROSSMAN [looking closely at him] He is falling asleep! He is asleep! A remarkably rapid occurrence of hypnosis. The subject has evidently already reached a state of anæsthesia. He is remarkable,–an unusually impressionable subject, and might be subjected to interesting experiments!… [Sits down, rises, sits down again] Now one might run a needle into his arm. If you like …
PROFESSOR [to Leoníd Fyódoritch] Do you notice how the medium’s trance acts on Grossman? He is beginning to vibrate.
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Yes, yes … can the lights be extinguished now?
SAHÁTOF. But why is darkness necessary?
PROFESSOR. Darkness? Because it is a condition of the manifestation of mediumistic energy, just as a given temperature is a condition necessary for certain manifestations of chemical or dynamic energy.
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. But not always. Manifestations have been observed by me, and by many others, both by candlelight and daylight.
PROFESSOR [interrupting] May the lights be put out?
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Yes, certainly. [Puts out candles] Ladies and gentlemen! attention, if you please.
Tánya gets from under the sofa and takes hold of a thread tied to a chandelier.
PETRÍSTCHEF. I like that Spaniard! Just in the midst of a conversation–off he goes head downwards … as the French say: piquer une tête.[13]
[13] To take a header.
BETSY. You just wait a bit, and see what will happen!
PETRÍSTCHEF. I have only one fear, and that is that Vovo may be moved by the spirit to grunt like a pig!
VASÍLY LEONÍDITCH. Would you like me to? I will …
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Gentlemen! Silence, if you please!
Silence. Simon licks the matches on his fingers and rubs his knuckles with them.
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. A light! Do you see the light?
SAHÁTOF. A light? Yes, yes, I see; but allow me …
FAT LADY. Where? Where? Oh dear, I did not see it! Ah, there it is. Oh!…
PROFESSOR [whispers to Leoníd Fyódoritch, and points to Grossman, who is moving] Do you notice how he vibrates? It is the dual influence. [The light appears again].
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [to the Professor] It must be he–you know!
SAHÁTOF. Who?
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. A Greek, Nicholas. It is his light. Don’t you think so, Alexéy Vladímiritch?
SAHÁTOF. Who is this Greek, Nicholas?
PROFESSOR. A certain Greek, who was a monk at Constantinople under Constantine and who has been visiting us lately.
FAT LADY. Where is he? Where is he? I don’t see him.
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. He is not yet visible … Alexéy Vladímiritch, he is particularly well disposed towards you. You question him.
PROFESSOR [in a peculiar voice] Nicholas! Is that you?
Tánya raps twice on the wall.
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [joyfully] It is he! It is he!
FAT LADY. Oh dear! Oh! I shall go away!
SAHÁTOF. Why do you suppose it is he?
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Why, the two knocks. It is an affirmative answer; else all would have been silence.
Silence. Suppressed giggling in the young people’s corner. Tánya throws a lampshade, pencil and penwiper upon the table.
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [whispers] Do you notice, gentlemen, here is a lamp-shade, and something else–a pencil!… Alexéy Vladímiritch, it is a pencil!
PROFESSOR. All right, all right! I am watching both him and Grossman!
Grossman rises and feels the things that have fallen on the table.
SAHÁTOF. Excuse me, excuse me! I should like to see whether it is not the medium who is doing it all himself?
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Do you think so? Well, sit by him and hold his hands. But you may be sure he is asleep.
SAHÁTOF [approaches. Tánya lets a thread touch his head. He is frightened, and stoops]. Ye … ye … yes! Strange, very strange! [Takes hold of Simon’s elbow. Simon howls].
PROFESSOR [to Leoníd Fyódoritch] Do you notice the effect of Grossman’s presence? It is a new phenomenon–I must note it … [Runs out to note it down, and returns again].
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Yes…. But we cannot leave Nicholas without an answer. We must begin …
GROSSMAN [rises, approaches Simon and raises and lowers his arm] It would be interesting to produce contraction! The subject is in profound hypnosis.
PROFESSOR [to Leoníd Fyódoritch] Do you see? Do you see?
GROSSMAN. If you like …
DOCTOR. Now then, my dear sir, leave the management to Alexéy Vladímiritch, the affair is turning out serious.
PROFESSOR. Leave him alone, he [referring to Grossman] is talking in his sleep!
FAT LADY. How glad I now am that I resolved to be present! It is frightening, but all the same I am glad, for I always said to my husband …
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Silence, if you please.
Tánya draws a thread over the Fat Lady’s head.
FAT LADY. Aie!
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. What? What is it?
FAT LADY. He took hold of my hair!
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [whispers] Never mind, don’t be afraid, give him your hand. His hand will be cold, but I like it.
FAT LADY [hides her hands] Not for the world!
SAHÁTOF. Yes, it is strange, very strange!
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. He is here and is seeking for intercourse. Who wishes to put a question to him?
SAHÁTOF. I should like to put a question, if I may.
PROFESSOR. Please do.
SAHÁTOF. Do I believe or not?
Tánya knocks twice.
PROFESSOR. The answer is affirmative.
SAHÁTOF. Allow me to ask again. Have I a ten rouble note in my pocket?
Tánya knocks several times and passes a thread over Sahátof’s head.
SAHÁTOF. Ah! [Seizes the thread and breaks it].
PROFESSOR. I should ask those present not to ask indefinite or trivial questions. It is unpleasant to him!
SAHÁTOF. No, but allow me! Here I have a thread in my hand!
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. A thread? Hold it fast; that happens often, and not only threads but sometimes even silk cords–very ancient ones!
SAHÁTOF. No–but where did this thread come from?
Tánya throws a cushion at him.
SAHÁTOF. Wait a bit; wait! Something soft has hit me on the head. Light a candle–there is something …
PROFESSOR. We beg of you not to interrupt the manifestations.
FAT LADY. For goodness’ sake don’t interrupt! I should also like to ask something. May I?
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Yes, if you like.
FAT LADY. I should like to ask about my digestion. May I? I want to know what to take: aconite or belladonna?
Silence, whispers among the young people; suddenly Vasíly Leoníditch begins to cry like a baby: “ou-a, ou-a!” [Laughter.] Holding their mouths and noses, the girls and Petrístchef run away bursting with laughter.
FAT LADY. Ah, that must be the monk who’s been born again!
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [beside himself with anger, whispers] One gets nothing but tomfoolery from you! If you don’t know how to behave decently, go away!
Exit Vasíly Leoníditch. Darkness and silence.
FAT LADY. Oh, what a pity! Now one can’t ask any more! He is born!
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Not at all. It is only Vovo’s nonsense. But he is here. Ask him.
PROFESSOR. That often happens. These jokes and ridicule are quite usual occurrences. I expect he is still here. But we may ask. Leoníd Fyódoritch, will you?
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. No, you, if you please. This has upset me. So unpleasant! Such want of tact!…
PROFESSOR. Very well…. Nicholas, are you here?
Tánya raps twice and rings. Simon roars, spreads his arms out, seizes Sahátof and the Professor–squeezing them.
PROFESSOR. What an unexpected phenomenon! The medium himself reacted upon! This never happened before! Leoníd Fyódoritch, will you watch? It is difficult for me to do so. He squeezes me so! Mind you observe Grossman! This needs the very greatest attention!
Tánya throws the peasants’ paper on the table.
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Something has fallen upon the table.
PROFESSOR. See what it is!
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Paper! A folded paper!
Tánya throws a travelling inkstand on the table.
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. An inkstand!
Tánya throws a pen.
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. A pen!
Simon roars and squeezes.
PROFESSOR [crushed] Wait a bit, wait: a totally new manifestation! The action proceeding not from the mediumistic energy produced, but from the medium himself! However, open the inkstand, and put the pen on the table, and he will write!
Tánya goes behind Leoníd Fyódoritch and strikes him on the head with the guitar.
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. He has struck me on the head! [Examining table] The pen is not writing yet and the paper remains folded.
PROFESSOR. See what the paper is, and quickly; evidently the dual influence–his and Grossman’s–has produced a perturbation!
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [goes out and returns at once] Extraordinary! This paper is an agreement with some peasants that I refused to sign this morning and returned to the peasants. Probably he wants me to sign it?
PROFESSOR. Of course! Of course! But ask him.
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Nicholas, do you wish …
Tánya knocks twice.
PROFESSOR. Do you hear? It is quite evident!
Leoníd Fyódoritch takes the paper and pen and goes out. Tánya knocks, plays on the guitar and the accordion, and then creeps under the sofa. Leoníd Fyódoritch returns. Simon stretches himself and coughs.
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. He is waking up. We can light the candles.
PROFESSOR [hurriedly] Doctor, Doctor, please, his pulse and temperature! You will see that a rise of both will be apparent.
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [lights the candles] Well, what do you gentlemen who were sceptical think of it
