LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Ah, that is interesting! Jumps into his hand? When he was drowsing?
TÁNYA. That I didn’t notice. I think he was, though.
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. Yes?…
TÁNYA. And that’s what I’m afraid of, and what I wanted to ask you about. May not some harm come of it? To live one’s life together, and him having such a thing in him!
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH [smiling] No, you need not be afraid, there is nothing bad in that. It only proves him to be a medium–simply a medium. I knew him to be a medium before this.
TÁNYA. So that’s what it is! And I was afraid!
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. No, there’s nothing to be afraid of. [Aside]. That’s capital! Kaptchítch can’t come, so we will test him to-night…. [To Tánya] No, my dear, don’t be afraid, he will be a good husband and … that is only a kind of special power, and every one has it, only in some it is weaker and in others stronger.
TÁNYA. Thank you, sir. Now I shan’t think any more about it; but I was so frightened…. What a thing it is, our want of education!
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. No, no, don’t be frightened… Theodore!
Enter Theodore Ivánitch.
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. I am going out now. Get everything ready for to-night’s séance.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. But Mr. Kaptchítch is not coming.
LEONÍD FYÓDORITCH. That does not matter. [Puts on overcoat] We shall have a trial séance with our own medium. [Exit. Theodore Ivánitch goes out with him].
TÁNYA [alone] He believes it! He believes it! [Shrieks and jumps with joy] He really believes it! Isn’t it wonderful! [Shrieks] Now I’ll do it, if only Simon has pluck for it!
Theodore Ivánitch returns.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Well, have you told him your secret?
TÁNYA. I’ll tell you too, only later on…. But I have a favour to ask of you too, Theodore Ivánitch.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Yes? What is it?
TÁNYA [shyly] You have been a second father to me, and I will open my heart before you as before God.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Don’t beat about the bush, but come straight to the point.
TÁNYA. The point is … well, the point is, that Simon wants to marry me.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Is that it? I thought I noticed …
TÁNYA. Well, why should I hide it? I am an orphan, and you know yourself how matters are in these town establishments. Every one comes bothering; there’s that Gregory Miháylitch, for instance, he gives me no peace. And also that other one … you know. They think I have no soul, and am only here for their amusement.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Good girl, that’s right! Well, what then?
TÁNYA. Well, Simon wrote to his father; and he, his father, sees me to-day, and says: “He’s spoilt”–he means his son. Theodore Ivánitch [bows], take the place of a father to me, speak to the old man,–to Simon’s father! I could take them into the kitchen, and you might come in and speak to the old man!
THEODORE IVÁNITCH [smiling] Then I am to turn match-maker–am I? Well, I can do that.
TÁNYA. Theodore Ivánitch, dearest, be a father to me, and I’ll pray for you all my life long.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. All right, all right, I’ll come later on. Haven’t I promised? [Takes up newspaper].
TÁNYA. You are a second father to me!
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. All right, all right.
TÁNYA. Then I’ll rely on you. [Exit].
THEODORE IVÁNITCH [alone, shaking his head] A good affectionate girl. To think that so many like her perish! Get but once into trouble and she’ll go from hand to hand until she sinks into the mire, and can never be found again! There was that dear little Nataly. She, too, was a good girl, reared and cared for by a mother. [Takes up paper] Well, let’s see what tricks Ferdinand is up to in Bulgaria.
Curtain.
ACT II
Evening of the same day. The scene represents the interior of the servants’ kitchen. The Peasants have taken off their outer garments and sit drinking tea at the table, and perspiring. Theodore Ivánitch is smoking a cigar at the other side of the stage. The discharged Cook is lying on the brick oven, and is unseen during the early part of the scene.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. My advice is, don’t hinder him! If it’s his wish and hers, in Heaven’s name let him do it. She is a good, honest girl. Never mind her being a bit dressy; she can’t help that, living in town: she is a good girl all the same.
SECOND PEASANT. Well, of course, if it is his wish, let him! He’ll have to live with her, not me. But she’s certainly uncommon spruce. How’s one to take her into one’s hut? Why, she’ll not let her mother-in-law so much as pat her on the head.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. That does not depend on the spruceness, but on character. If her nature is good, she’s sure to be docile and respectful.
SECOND PEASANT. Ah, well, we’ll have her if the lad’s bent on having her. After all, it’s a bad job to live with one as one don’t care for. I’ll consult my missus, and then may Heaven bless them!
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Then let’s shake hands on it!
SECOND PEASANT. Well, it seems it will have to come off.
FIRST PEASANT. Eh, Zachary! fortune’s a-smiling on you! You’ve come to accomplish a piece of business, and just see what a duchess of a daughter-in-law you’ve obtained. All that’s left to be done is to have a drink on it, and then it will be all in order.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. That’s not at all necessary. [An awkward silence].
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. I know something of your way of life too, you know. I am even thinking of purchasing a bit of land, building a cottage, and working on the land myself somewhere: maybe in your neighbourhood.
SECOND PEASANT. A very good thing too.
FIRST PEASANT. That’s just it. When one has got the money one can get all kinds of pleasure in the country.
THIRD PEASANT. Say no more about it! Country life, let’s say, is freer in every way, not like the town!
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. There now, would you let me join your Commune if I settled among you?
SECOND PEASANT. Why not? If you stand drink for the Elders, they’ll accept you soon enough!
FIRST PEASANT. And if you open a public-house, for example, or an inn, why, you’d have such a life you’d never need to die! You might live like a king, and no mistake.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Well, we’ll see. I should certainly like to have a few quiet years in my old age. Though my life here is good enough, and I should be sorry to leave. Leoníd Fyódoritch is an exceedingly kind-hearted man.
FIRST PEASANT. That’s just it. But how about our business? Is it possible that he is going to leave it without any termination?
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. He’d do it willingly.
SECOND PEASANT. It seems he’s afraid of his wife.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. It’s not that he’s afraid, but they don’t hit things off together.
THIRD PEASANT. But you should try, father! How are we to live else? We’ve so little land …
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. We’ll see what comes of Tánya’s attempt. She’s taken the business into her hands now!
THIRD PEASANT [takes a sip of tea] Father, be merciful. We’ve so little land. A hen, let’s say, we’ve no room for a hen, let alone the cattle.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. If the business depended on me…. [To Second Peasant] Well, friend, so we’ve done our bit of match-making! It’s agreed then about Tánya?
SECOND PEASANT. I’ve given my word, and I’ll not go back on it without a good reason. If only our business succeeds!
Enter Servants’ Cook who looks up at the oven, makes a sign, and then begins to speak animatedly to Theodore Ivánitch.
SERVANTS’ COOK. Just now Simon was called upstairs from the front kitchen! The master and that other bald-headed one who calls up spirits with him, ordered him to sit down and take the place of Kaptchítch!
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. You don’t say so!
SERVANTS’ COOK. Yes, Jacob told Tánya.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Extraordinary!
Enter Coachman.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. What do you want?
COACHMAN [to Theodore Ivánitch] You may just tell them I never agreed to live with a lot of dogs! Let any one who likes do it, but I will never agree to live among dogs!
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. What dogs?
COACHMAN. Three dogs have been sent into our room by Vasíly Leoníditch! They’ve messed it all over. They’re whining, and if one comes near them they bite–the devils! They’d tear you to pieces if you didn’t mind. I’ve a good mind to take a club and smash their legs for them!
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. But when did they come?
COACHMAN. Why, to-day, from the Dog Show; the devil knows what kind they are, but they’re an expensive sort. Are we or the dogs to live in the coachmen’s quarters? You just go and ask!
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. Yes, that will never do. I’ll go and ask about it.
COACHMAN. They’d better be brought here to Loukérya.
SERVANTS’ COOK [angrily] People have to eat here, and you’d like to lock dogs in here! As it is …
COACHMAN. And I’ve got the liveries, and the sledge-covers and the harness there, and they expect things kept clean! Perhaps the porter’s lodge might do.
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. I must ask Vasíly Leoníditch.
COACHMAN [angrily] He’d better hang the brutes round his neck and lug them about with him! But no fear: he’d rather ride on horseback himself. It’s he as spoilt Beauty without rhyme or reason. That was a horse!… Oh dear! what a life! [Exit, slamming door].
THEODORE IVÁNITCH. That’s not right! Certainly not right! [To Peasants] Well then, it’s time we were saying good-bye, friends.
PEASANTS. Good-bye!
Exit Theodore Ivánitch.
As soon as he is gone a sound of groaning is heard from the top of the oven.
SECOND PEASANT. He’s
